Sometimes in life something so little can actually be something big. This is what happened a couple of weeks ago. For a long time people have asked why have faith? My response was without faith you can’t have hope. I still believe this, but believe this is only part of the story. The other part of the story is a good question to ask yourself…have you ever thought God could be present by giving peace within the storms?
Wow, for me, when I heard this, I said this is it! Don’t get me wrong, nobody ever hopes for storms, but where God has been the most present is where there is unrest. Times where in the past I would be jumping out of my skin, lose sleep, and get sick to my stomach is now a time where I can breathe. Instead of letting the grief, anxiety, or pain overtake me, I know there is a bigger picture. It is still not easy to see joy in the darkness, but at least I don’t need to stay in the grey.
If it was about me, I would have crumbled knowing my baby wasn’t going to make it to her birth, stayed in a hole when through the office walls they said they were letting me go, gone into hysterics when I learned of unfaithfulness, fell apart when we weren’t the chosen parents for an adoption, etc. Instead I was sad, hurt, upset, but wasn’t broken. Being human, I allowed myself to mourn the change, but then allowed myself to get up, to heal, and to let God show his grace.
What grace has meant for me is my husband excelled at a company who first let me go, got the opportunity to adopt my amazing daughter, restored a great relationship, made my own path for my career which included a promotion and then finding my own leadership positions, etc. When they say beauty can be made from ashes – this is my life.
Yes, being able to rejoice in beauty has been amazing, but the bigger gift is the blanket of peace. Since I can’t look into a crystal ball and know storms are still coming, knowing there is peace to lean on has made life’s hurdles doable. I’ve learned to just let it go, to not dwell, to read God’s word, and to pray, pray, pray for the light at the end of the tunnel whatever this means in God’s terms. Outside of our own comprehension, God doesn’t always choose to take away the storm or doesn’t give us the answer we expect, but if we allow it – we can have beauty from ashes or peace in the storm.
