As a parent, we preach to our children don’t lie, but then we believe in the lies. We believe in the lies we’re not good enough, we can’t do it, we’re not strong enough, we’re unlovable, etc. My life is a perfect example. Recently, someone close to me said my caring and emotional side is too much for some people to handle. For a couple of days, my mind questioned whether I needed to change, but then God very clearly said to me – “What do you think you’re doing?” On an utterly rotten day where the instinct was to go home and hide in the covers – he convinced me to go spend time with friends. That evening, a woman whom I recently met shared two important stories. The first story was an unraveling of her life since college. Her recent insecurities, addictions, shame, and struggle with anorexia. She said on the outside she is career oriented and no one would ever know, but on the inside she was a mess. Life was being lived outside her window and she couldn’t live it. She said she could count the number of people who she shared her story with and she chose me. She then proceeded to tell me she looked up to my confidence, ability to listen, and the way I handle myself. This story is important because what she was saying to me and the lies we all create within ourselves. As karma goes, the same week my lap top had a technical issue and then a weather issue impacted a meeting with the same group of Directors, VPs, and Senior Managers. People who don’t have time on their calendars to waste. People who were all IT and technical and less than accepting of those with little technical acumen. My mind went directly to maybe I can’t do this job, they will surely fire me, etc. A lot of confidence, ha? However, it reinforces the story of us believing in the lies. In this woman’s eyes, I am confident. In my eyes, I was one block away from a disaster.
A similar story occurred at work with a man who never shares personal stories, but with me, he told me his wife and her struggle with terminal cancer. A good lesson in humility, but also a good lesson that perhaps my strengths have a time and place. Sure, I can’t fix a car, but with my strengths I can fix a moment in time or a severed heart. Not to say one strength is more important than another because we need everyone’s strengths to make this world go round, but what we don’t need is the lies. It’s easy to let humans or evil convince you how menial your strength is within the bigger picture. It’s easy to consider yourself as a freak to nature. What isn’t easy is understanding we all have something to offer. If my strength didn’t show visibly on my shirt sleeve, there is no way the woman would have regurgitated her story to me or the man at work would have confided in me. The beautiful part is it is easy for me. It is part of my DNA to care. I am the woman on the airplane who everyone tells their story. For you, who knows what is your strength, but hopefully you have a similar experience. Whatever your strength is hopefully it feels like ice cream in summer. The goal is to quiet the haters and to accentuate the believers and requestors. If you’re still stuck in the lies, it is nearly impossible to see above the horizon. Next, you have to be open to what life offers you. God, will use you and your strengths when they are the most needed for you and for others. You have to believe in the process. For me, a smile always adrupts on my face when I say, “Well, that was a God thing.” There have been plenty of those experiences in my life. However, I only became conscious to these God moments when the door was left open. When I began to believe in myself and my own strengths. Yes, at times, we may all fail in our strengths, but if we’re not open or we don’t try, then what have we gained? So the next time someone calls you silly because they don’t get you or your strengths, step back for a moment and ask yourself whether you believe the lie or whether you believe the gift you’re given. For life all happens with perfect timing and perfect strengths.
